everything sounds funnier as fake-Norse epic

[brushwolf]

Hear! We of the Spear-Danes in olden days of the kings
Have heard of this fated trip
That trod the whale's road from Tromso
Aboard this small vessel!

The helmsman was a skilled sailor
Who served his liege, a jarl brave and sure
Five chosen bondsmen in bright hauberks chose to sail that day
For a voyage of but three hours

Bitter winter's blasts called out their path
Waves tossed the small ship
The crew's courage did not falter
And was thus the Long Serpent saved from dooms

The ship set ground in a foreign land far away
With Sigifrith Fork-beard
His thegn
A wealthy man and the ring-giver, his wife
A skilled swordsman already told of in many sagas
A wise man [runic magician?] and Asgunnr
Here on Sigifrith's Island

Attend this story of castaways stranded for many years
As though an uphill climb on a tall mountain
Mate and liege-lord alike would grant these others comfort
In their rocky island nest
Without mead, nor mill, nor fine cloths, nor luxury
[fragment ends]